Friday, February 18, 2011

thirty-two, party of one.

Yesterday I only did one load of laundry.  I didn’t get angry when Sam turned the crayon box out onto the floor in the kitchen, nor did I growl at the dog for eating robins-egg blue.  I had chips for with lunch and read my book during nap time instead of washing the breakfast dishes.

The telephone chimed every ten minutes and messages added up.  Starting at six-thirty in the morning, people remembered my birthday.  Before even emerging from the tent over her bed, Ladybug’s first words were a morning-whispered "happy birthday mommy” as I laid her school uniform out for the day.  I turned on the radio in the kitchen and poured cereal and heated water for oatmeal.  I cut the crusts off a ham and cheese before putting it in the lunchbox with something chocolate (gasp).  Two wishes I rarely grant for the first-grader.

“it’s your birthday, don’t get angry.” was my mantra. don’t get too tired, it’s your birthday. just be happy and make them happy, it’s your birthday.  Sam got filthy at the park and the kids ate a whole bag of Goldfish crackers after school.  Yes was the word, mostly, to the ever-flowing stream of questions.  No, you can’t ride bikes in the street.

My brother in law called me.  My mother in law called and sent me an early-morning text.  My best friend called from New York and then called back when the connection was bad.  Jed called for Chinese food. My mom didn’t call.  Nobody cried that I can recall.  

But today I really feel like crap.  I tried to treat it like any other day.  Gift-wrapped a little slack for myself.  No guilt allowed.  It was nice.  Not enough, but nice. Next year I’ll try something else. 

7 comments:

Janna Bee said...

Happy Birthday! I will be right there @ 32 in 3 months, so I feel your pain. Last year I went to lunch and a movie by myself for my Birthday which I thought would be depressing, but it was actually kind of nice to get away. I hope you get some alone time too today.

MaryAnne said...

Happy birthday! Here's hoping for a very fun 33 next year =)

I'm sorry your mom didn't call.

You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun... said...

it could have been worse...

after planning my OWN surprise big 30th bday party, i gave up on it bc my husband convinced me it would be better to go to vegas (coincidentally, his favorite place to go). the trip was fucking horrible, we argued the whole time, and i got jipped out of everything "happy 30" related.

we split up two months later (which was actually the best gift i got).

happy birthday! :)

Christine--RHP said...

happy birthday lovely lady!!! looks like you had a jampacked mama day! (I hope there was some cake in there somewhere...) and sorry you felt like crap. boo.

Eat and Grow Rich said...

Happy Birthday pretty lady!
As a mother of five grown children I have learned our birthdays are what WE make them. Be sure to decline invitations to parties catered by stress. Every year does get better when we look within for our happiness.

Sara Louise said...

I like your "it's your birthday, don't get angry" mantra.
Happy birthday to you (a few days late), cheers to all your wishes coming true! Mine was a couple of weeks ago and my Dad didn't call me :-( but I didn't get angry :-)

Leslie said...

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